Dissociative Identity: Signs, Symptoms, and Seeking Help

Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)

Hello, doctor.
I don't know what's wrong with me, but my classmates say that sometimes I am completely different from my usual self.
Normally, I am very talkative, optimistic, and love to make people laugh.
However, during a recent day, I completely forgot what I was doing, and the next day my classmates told me that I was very scary.
They said I became very indifferent, laughing happily while watching medical videos of people dying.
When chatting with them, I kept saying that I am not [name], and that he is hiding.
Since childhood through high school, I was always afraid of being beaten by my father, terrified of his cold remarks, and scared to see my father, mother, and younger brother happily chatting without acknowledging me.
In summary, my life only started to feel meaningful after leaving home for college.
I once seriously considered suicide in elementary school, and it happened twice in middle school.
Back then, even seeing my father smile at me would fill me with dread.
I don't know if I have a mental illness, and I am unsure whether I should see a psychiatrist because it feels like that would mean I am sick.

Wu Tongxue, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2018/05/20

Dr. Qiu Junda reply Psychiatry

Hello.
The symptoms described in the text are quite diverse, but there seems to be a predominance of negative emotional behaviors, including suicidal (self-harming) actions.
I hope you can cherish yourself.
Just as you are asking questions, it is likely that you hope to improve your mental and physical well-being.
I recommend that you seek consultation at a mental health clinic as soon as possible (this does not necessarily mean you have a disorder).
If it is inconvenient or you have other considerations, you can also reach out for help by calling Teacher Zhang at 1980 or the Lifeline at 1995.
They will also provide counseling, consultation, referral, and other services to help you alleviate your distress.

Reply Date: 2018/05/20

More Info

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and the signs and symptoms associated with it can be quite complex, especially when considering the emotional and psychological factors involved. Based on your description, it seems that you are experiencing significant changes in your behavior and emotional state, which could be indicative of a dissociative disorder or other mental health issues.
Dissociative Identity Disorder, previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder, is characterized by the presence of two or more distinct personality states or an experience of possession. Individuals with DID often have gaps in memory regarding everyday events, personal information, and traumatic events. These memory lapses can lead to confusion and a sense of detachment from oneself, which may explain your feelings of being different from your usual self.

The signs you mentioned, such as feeling cold and detached, laughing inappropriately at distressing situations, and expressing that you are not yourself, are concerning and warrant further exploration. These behaviors can be manifestations of dissociation, a coping mechanism that allows individuals to distance themselves from traumatic experiences or overwhelming emotions. Your history of trauma, particularly related to your father, could be a significant factor contributing to these dissociative symptoms.

It's important to recognize that experiencing these symptoms does not mean you are "crazy" or that you have a severe mental illness. Many people go through periods of emotional distress, especially when they have unresolved trauma or stressors in their lives. However, seeking help from a mental health professional is a crucial step in understanding what you are experiencing and finding appropriate support.

Here are some steps you can take:
1. Seek Professional Help: It is highly advisable to consult with a mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist, who specializes in trauma and dissociative disorders. They can provide a comprehensive assessment and help you understand your symptoms better.

2. Document Your Experiences: Keeping a journal of your feelings, behaviors, and any dissociative episodes can be helpful for both you and your therapist. This documentation can provide insight into patterns and triggers related to your symptoms.

3. Explore Therapy Options: Different therapeutic approaches, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), or trauma-focused therapy, can be beneficial. These therapies can help you process traumatic experiences and develop coping strategies.

4. Build a Support System: Surround yourself with supportive friends or family members who can provide understanding and encouragement. It’s essential to have people you trust who can help you navigate your feelings.

5. Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that promote relaxation and well-being, such as mindfulness, meditation, or physical exercise. These practices can help ground you and reduce anxiety.

6. Educate Yourself: Learning more about dissociative disorders and mental health can empower you and reduce feelings of isolation. Understanding that you are not alone in your experiences can be comforting.

In conclusion, while your experiences may be distressing, they are also a signal that you deserve support and understanding. Reaching out for help is a courageous step, and it can lead to healing and a better understanding of yourself. Remember, mental health is just as important as physical health, and seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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