Negative emotions
Hello, Doctor.
I apologize for the lengthy message, but I really need your help.
I am a person with congenital disabilities and have been unemployed for a long time.
I finally found a company willing to hire me, and at first, I was genuinely grateful to all the supervisors and colleagues there.
I hoped to work until retirement, and this gratitude kept me going for over six years.
However, as time passed, I began to notice the darker side of the people in the company.
It truly confirms the saying that "too many people lead to too many opinions." People often complain behind others' backs but are too afraid to address issues directly.
Even when there is no animosity, they will complain to supervisors about those they dislike.
One day, a colleague told me that someone I trusted was discussing my work-related matters.
I was taken aback because I thought this person understood me since we had worked together.
I felt disappointed and wanted to confirm this with him, but knowing his personality, I hesitated to ask.
This unresolved feeling has weighed heavily on my mind.
After hearing so many things I was unaware of, I gradually felt that the workplace atmosphere was quite negative.
It turns out that everyone has a dual nature; they may smile at you on the surface, but behind your back, they might be complaining about you.
I find this very frightening, and I truly dislike this kind of environment.
Additionally, my health has been deteriorating.
I feel exhausted every day at work and am experiencing signs of burnout.
My mood has been consistently low, and I really don't want to go to work.
When I need to take sick leave due to my health issues, my supervisors often show visible discomfort.
I know they dislike employees who take leave, but they fail to understand that taking leave is sometimes unavoidable.
Instead, they perceive it as an inconvenience.
Consequently, every time I request leave, I feel as though it's my fault, which makes me feel very small and insignificant.
I truly despise this version of myself.
I have considered resigning, but I wonder what other job I could do.
My family likely wouldn't agree, and I can only rely on myself to make a living.
This job was a result of my supervisor's kindness, and if I resign, I might face another long period of unemployment.
Right now, I feel like I'm bending over backward just to make ends meet.
However, my health is declining, and I don't know how much longer I can endure this situation.
The dark atmosphere at work makes me dread going in.
Sometimes, I wish I could just die, but I fear the unknown that comes with death, so I continue to struggle through life.
I really don't know what to do.
Niming, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2022/01/10
Dr. Qiu Junda reply Psychiatry
Hello.
The negative emotional behaviors mentioned in the text are mostly related to the work environment and interpersonal relationships, and they have already caused physical and mental distress.
It is recommended that you seek consultation and evaluation at a mental health clinic as soon as possible.
If that is not convenient, please also reach out to the Ministry of Health and Welfare's (1925) Mental Health Hotline.
They can provide counseling, consultation, referral, and other services to help you alleviate your distress.
Additionally, here are some simple methods you can try: get some sunlight in the morning and evening, and occasionally eat some chocolate, which may help improve your mood and alleviate negative emotions.
Reply Date: 2022/01/10
More Info
Navigating negative emotions in a toxic workplace can be incredibly challenging, especially when you have a history of mental health issues and physical disabilities. It’s commendable that you have held onto your job for over six years, but it’s also understandable that the environment has begun to take a toll on your mental and physical well-being. Let’s break down your concerns and explore some strategies that may help you cope with this difficult situation.
Understanding the Workplace Dynamics
You’ve described a workplace where gossip and negativity thrive, which can create a hostile environment. It’s common for employees to feel disillusioned when they discover that colleagues they trusted are speaking about them behind their backs. This can lead to feelings of betrayal and isolation. The fact that you feel uncomfortable addressing these issues directly with your coworkers is also indicative of a toxic culture where open communication is not encouraged.
The Impact on Mental and Physical Health
The stress from a toxic workplace can manifest in various ways, including anxiety, depression, and physical symptoms such as fatigue and burnout. It’s important to recognize that your feelings of exhaustion and reluctance to go to work are valid responses to your environment. Chronic stress can lead to serious health issues, and it’s crucial to prioritize your well-being.
Strategies for Coping
1. Set Boundaries: Establishing boundaries can help protect your mental health. This might mean limiting your interactions with particularly negative colleagues or finding ways to disengage from gossip. You can also set boundaries around your work hours to ensure you have time to recharge.
2. Seek Support: Consider talking to a trusted friend or family member about your experiences. Sometimes, just sharing your feelings can provide relief. If you feel comfortable, you might also explore speaking with a mental health professional who can help you process your emotions and develop coping strategies.
3. Focus on Self-Care: Engage in activities that promote your well-being outside of work. This could include exercise, meditation, or hobbies that bring you joy. Prioritizing self-care can help mitigate the effects of workplace stress.
4. Document Your Experiences: Keeping a journal of your thoughts and feelings can be therapeutic. It allows you to express your emotions and reflect on your experiences. If you ever decide to address workplace issues formally, having a record can be helpful.
5. Consider Your Options: While it’s understandable to feel trapped in your current job, it’s important to explore your options. Research other job opportunities that might be a better fit for you. You might also consider reaching out to vocational rehabilitation services that can assist individuals with disabilities in finding suitable employment.
6. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness techniques can help you stay grounded and reduce anxiety. Practices such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can help you manage stress and improve your overall mental health.
7. Evaluate Your Work Environment: If the toxicity of your workplace continues to affect your health, it may be worth considering a change. While the fear of unemployment is valid, staying in a harmful environment can have long-term consequences on your mental and physical health.
Conclusion
It’s clear that you are in a difficult situation, and it’s important to acknowledge the toll it’s taking on your well-being. Remember that you are not alone in feeling this way, and there are resources and strategies available to help you navigate these challenges. Prioritize your health and well-being, and don’t hesitate to seek support when needed. Your life and happiness are worth fighting for, and taking small steps toward change can lead to a more positive future.
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