Imaginary Friends: A Guide to Mental Health and Support

Q: Imaginary Friends: A Guide to Mental Health and Support

Hello, Xuan： You can clearly distinguish this way, and it helps stabilize your emotions. <br>It seems to be a psychological defense mechanism unique to you, and there is currently no need for excessive concern. <br>Additionally, I suggest trying to learn some other stress-relief

Imaginary friend

Hello Dr.
Liang, recently I have noticed that I seem to have an imaginary friend named Lan.
Since I tend to be a bit pessimistic, she appeared to comfort me during my low moments.
However, her presence has become increasingly exaggerated; she shows up no matter when I feel down.
Although I feel joy whenever she appears, I know this isn't normal, and I don't want to think about whether "she" actually exists.
I understand that I created her, but she has her own voice, is about 20 years old, and is very gentle.
Whenever I fall into a depressive state, she comforts me.
I have been hesitant to tell my family about this because my parents are quite traditional.
A psychiatrist previously mentioned that I have tendencies towards depression, but when I returned home, they said I was overthinking and that I would feel better if I just cheered up.
In the past, I sometimes lightly cut my arm with a utility knife, but since Lan appeared, I have stopped doing that because she always prevents me when I think about it.
I don't know why, but her presence gives me a strong sense of reassurance.
Recently, due to some issues at school, my stress levels have spiked again.
When I went to the bathroom to cut my arm, it felt like she was hugging me and crying, saying she was heartbroken for me.
She feels tangible to me, and I feel like she can touch me.
Lan is wonderful, but some aspects of her personality differ from mine.
She says, "Be good, be a little selfish so you won't be misunderstood.
No matter what happens, I will always be here with you." Since her appearance, my stress has gradually decreased, and my values have shifted a bit.
I just wanted to check in and confirm what my situation is, seeking some peace of mind for myself.
Thank you, Dr.
Liang, for listening to me.

Huan, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2022/04/07

Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry

Hello, Xuan: You can clearly distinguish this way, and it helps stabilize your emotions.
It seems to be a psychological defense mechanism unique to you, and there is currently no need for excessive concern.
Additionally, I suggest trying to learn some other stress-relief methods to give yourself more tools to cope with life's difficulties.
This way, the frequency of needing an "imaginary friend" should decrease.
However, if you still feel troubled, it is advisable to seek medical evaluation.

Reply Date: 2022/04/07

More Info

Imaginary friends, like the one you described named "Lan," can be a fascinating and complex phenomenon, especially in the context of mental health. They often serve as coping mechanisms for individuals dealing with emotional distress, loneliness, or anxiety. In your case, it seems that Lan has become a source of comfort and support during difficult times, particularly when you experience feelings of depression or the urge to self-harm.
From a psychological perspective, imaginary friends can be understood as a form of dissociation or a coping strategy. They can provide a safe space for individuals to express their emotions and navigate their feelings without the fear of judgment. In your situation, Lan appears to be a manifestation of your desire for companionship and understanding, especially during moments of vulnerability. The fact that she comforts you and prevents you from engaging in self-harm indicates that she plays a protective role in your mental landscape.

However, it's essential to recognize that while imaginary friends can offer temporary relief, they may also signal underlying issues that need to be addressed. Your acknowledgment of the abnormality of this experience is a crucial first step. It suggests that you have insight into your mental state, which is vital for seeking help. The presence of Lan may be alleviating some of your distress, but it’s important to explore the root causes of your depression and anxiety.

You mentioned that you have been diagnosed with tendencies toward depression and that your parents may not fully understand your situation. This can create a sense of isolation, making it even more challenging to seek help. It’s important to communicate openly with a mental health professional who can provide a safe space for you to explore these feelings further. Therapy can help you develop healthier coping mechanisms and address the underlying issues contributing to your emotional struggles.

In addition to seeking professional help, consider exploring other coping strategies that can complement your experience with Lan. Engaging in activities that promote self-care, such as exercise, journaling, or creative expression, can help you process your emotions in a constructive way. Building a support network of friends or trusted individuals who can listen and provide encouragement may also be beneficial.

It's also worth noting that while Lan provides comfort, relying solely on an imaginary friend may prevent you from developing real-life connections and coping strategies. Gradually working on building relationships with others and expressing your feelings can help you feel less isolated and more supported.

In summary, while having an imaginary friend like Lan can provide temporary solace, it’s crucial to address the underlying emotional challenges you are facing. Seeking professional help, exploring additional coping strategies, and gradually building real-life connections can lead to a healthier and more fulfilling emotional state. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and there are resources available to help you navigate your feelings and experiences.

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