Stress issues
Hello, Doctor.
I would like to ask for your advice.
I have suffered from the pain of long-term bullying during my middle and high school years, which has made me more introverted and prone to overthinking.
I don't have many close friends and lack social activities.
We are in a family business, and my father has had a stroke in recent years, so I have had to shoulder everything alone.
Due to the pandemic, we are facing price competition, and the business has become very bleak, which adds to my immense pressure.
Recently, for the past nine months, I have been experiencing persistent chapped lips, which has caused me significant anxiety.
I have seen several dermatologists, but the topical treatments have not improved my condition; in fact, it has worsened.
I would like to ask you, Doctor, if this could be due to excessive stress leading to inflammatory conditions in my body.
(I actually have some skin disorders, but after seeing over a dozen doctors without improvement, the lip issue has made me even more anxious.)
Lastly, I want to say that I genuinely feel like life has lost its meaning.
Although I haven't done many good deeds, I believe I haven't harmed anyone either.
Yet, I am facing these problems in life.
Sometimes I wonder why those who bullied me seem to be doing so well while I am struggling.
I have tried to change my mindset, but then I encounter more issues that pull me back into negative thoughts, and I even have fleeting thoughts of wanting to escape it all.
Thank you for taking the time to read my few words amidst your busy schedule.
I appreciate your efforts, and I wish you all the best.
Niming, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2023/04/30
Dr. Cai Qijin reply Psychiatry
Hello: Based on your description, the trauma experienced during adolescence continues to have an impact on both your physical and mental health, affecting interpersonal relationships and social interactions, making it more difficult to cope with stress in daily life.
Many physiological issues, such as irritable bowel syndrome, urticaria, and immune system disorders, have been shown to be related to psychosomatic stress.
It is advisable to seek assistance from a psychiatrist to evaluate whether medication or psychotherapy may be beneficial, as experience suggests that both can lead to improvement.
Reply Date: 2023/04/30
More Info
It sounds like you are going through an incredibly challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the pain and stress you are experiencing. The effects of bullying during your formative years can have lasting impacts on mental health, leading to feelings of anxiety, isolation, and self-doubt. Coupled with the immense pressure of managing a family business, especially under the strain of a pandemic and your father's health issues, it is understandable that you feel overwhelmed.
Your symptoms, including the persistent lip peeling and the anxiety that accompanies it, may indeed be linked to the stress you are under. Stress can manifest physically in various ways, including skin issues, as the body reacts to emotional turmoil. The skin is often referred to as a "window to the soul," and conditions like eczema, psoriasis, or even simple dryness can worsen under stress. It’s crucial to address both the psychological and physical aspects of your health.
Here are some strategies that may help you cope with your situation:
1. Seek Professional Help: It’s essential to consult with a mental health professional who can provide support tailored to your experiences. Therapy can be a safe space to explore your feelings about bullying, family responsibilities, and the pressures of running a business. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for anxiety and can help you reframe negative thoughts.
2. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practices such as mindfulness meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga can help reduce anxiety and improve your emotional well-being. These techniques encourage you to focus on the present moment, which can alleviate the burden of past traumas and future worries.
3. Physical Health: Since you mentioned skin issues, it’s important to maintain a healthy routine. Ensure you are drinking enough water, eating a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains, and getting regular exercise. These factors can significantly impact both your mental and physical health.
4. Social Connections: Although you feel isolated, try to reach out to others, even if it’s just a small step. Engaging with supportive friends or family members can provide a sense of belonging and reduce feelings of loneliness. If you don’t have close friends, consider joining support groups or community activities where you can meet people with similar experiences.
5. Set Boundaries: It’s vital to recognize your limits, especially when managing a family business. Delegate tasks when possible, and don’t hesitate to ask for help. It’s okay to prioritize your mental health over work obligations.
6. Challenge Negative Thoughts: When you find yourself dwelling on negative comparisons with others, try to challenge those thoughts. Reflect on your strengths and accomplishments. Journaling can be a helpful tool for processing your feelings and tracking your progress.
7. Consider Medication: If your anxiety and stress become too overwhelming, discussing medication options with a healthcare provider may be beneficial. Antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications can help manage symptoms, allowing you to engage more fully in therapy and other coping strategies.
8. Focus on Small Goals: Instead of feeling overwhelmed by the entirety of your responsibilities, break them down into smaller, manageable tasks. Celebrate small victories to build confidence and motivation.
It’s important to remember that healing is a journey, and it’s okay to seek help along the way. You are not alone in this, and there are resources available to support you through these difficult times. Your life does have meaning, and with the right support and strategies, you can find a path forward that brings you peace and fulfillment.
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