Overcoming Social Anxiety: Seeking Help and Finding Solutions

Q: Overcoming Social Anxiety: Seeking Help and Finding Solutions

Hello, Xiao Pang： Some anticipated anxiety and negative thinking may appear to others as "overthinking." In fact, the individual often knows they are overthinking, but how can they stop themselves from doing so? In your case, social anxiety disorder involves not only anxiety and

Social anxiety?

Hello Dr.
Chen: As the title suggests, I believe I have social anxiety disorder.
I have listed my symptoms and examples...
1.
I am hesitant to go shopping alone because I have to speak to the store staff; even ordering food is difficult for me to initiate.
2.
I am very afraid of going to places like hair salons or clothing stores, as I always feel that the well-dressed staff and hairdressers are judging my appearance.
3.
I find it hard to chat with people; I am not very talkative, and when I see someone, I become very nervous and don't know what to say, which makes the atmosphere awkward.
Especially in groups, I rarely express my opinions because I fear being rejected or making the situation uncomfortable.
4.
I am afraid of being in crowded places.
Although I know it's not true, I feel like everyone is watching me, which makes me stiff and uncomfortable, especially when there are attractive girls or fashionable people around, making me wonder if they are talking negatively about me or judging my looks.
5.
I lack the courage to raise my hand in class; self-introductions and speaking in front of a group make me hesitant.
6.
When I see someone I know approaching, I can't greet them naturally, especially if I am not familiar with them.
In high school, I often hid in the classroom after class, and even when I went outside, I would keep my head down to avoid eye contact, pretending not to see anyone.
These are the main points I can think of; in short, I feel extremely uncomfortable interacting with others.
Recently, I have even found it difficult to interact with my family.
I believe my issues stem from having too much pride, low self-confidence, an avoidance mentality, and perfectionism, but I struggle to accept myself due to my appearance.
Additionally, I have been introverted since childhood, and it has worsened over time...
I have mentioned this to my friends, but they all think I am overthinking it.
Maybe I am, or perhaps my situation isn't that severe, but I truly cannot face crowds naturally...
University is approaching, and I am very scared.
I suffered through three painful years in high school, and I am exhausted.
I am considering taking a year off to see a doctor and adjust myself, but I don't know how to talk to my parents about it.
Should I go to university instead? I have already avoided it for a year, staying at home every day, with my mother preparing all my meals.
I am afraid to even buy food myself, feeling like I am becoming useless.
I know I can't continue like this, but my avoidance tendencies make me unwilling and afraid to try to change.
If I can't face people for a day, I can't see my future, and I become very lost, leading me to not want to do anything.
When feelings of pessimism and despair arise, I sometimes think about suicide, but I don't want to die.
I have rambled on a lot, and I am a bit lost for words...
Thank you for patiently reading this.
Questions: 1.
Is it possible for me to self-treat? 2.
Do I need to take a year off? How should I explain this to my parents? I feel like they will say I am just avoiding things or overthinking.
The reason I haven't spoken up is that I feel like no one will understand, and I am afraid they will think I am foolish.
3.
I live in Hsinchu; do you have any recommended hospitals or doctors? Thank you!!

Xiao Pang, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2008/09/03

Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry

Hello, Xiao Pang: Some anticipated anxiety and negative thinking may appear to others as "overthinking." In fact, the individual often knows they are overthinking, but how can they stop themselves from doing so? In your case, social anxiety disorder involves not only anxiety and fear but also an element of "avoidance," meaning you intentionally avoid facing certain situations.
If avoidance behaviors occur, they can impact three major functions: interpersonal relationships, career, and social interactions, which necessitates treatment.
Regarding social anxiety disorder, in addition to cognitive-behavioral therapy, combining it with certain antidepressants and anxiolytics can yield good results.
Especially since you are still young, it is important to address this issue during your student years so that you can navigate the future more confidently.
The mental health resources in the Hsinchu area are quite abundant.
The Hsinchu City Hospital's Psychiatry Department is a good option.
Thank you for your letter!

Reply Date: 2008/09/03

More Info

Overcoming social anxiety can be a challenging journey, especially when it feels like your fears are deeply rooted in your self-perception and past experiences. From what you've shared, it seems you're grappling with significant social anxiety symptoms that are impacting your daily life and self-esteem. Let's address your questions and provide some guidance on how to seek help and find solutions.

1. Can I Self-Treat My Social Anxiety?
While self-help strategies can be beneficial, overcoming social anxiety often requires a multifaceted approach. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most effective treatments for social anxiety disorder. It involves identifying and challenging negative thought patterns and beliefs that contribute to your anxiety. Here are some self-help strategies you can try:
- Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings about social situations. This can help you identify patterns and triggers.

- Gradual Exposure: Start with small social interactions that feel manageable, such as greeting a cashier or making small talk with a neighbor. Gradually increase the complexity of these interactions.

- Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practice mindfulness meditation, deep breathing exercises, or progressive muscle relaxation to help manage anxiety symptoms.

- Positive Affirmations: Replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations. For example, remind yourself that it's okay to be imperfect and that everyone has their own insecurities.

However, while these strategies can be helpful, they may not be sufficient for everyone. If your symptoms are severe, seeking professional help is crucial.

2. Should I Take a Year Off from School? How Do I Explain This to My Parents?
Deciding whether to take a year off from school is a significant choice that should be made carefully. If you believe that a break would allow you to focus on your mental health and seek treatment, it might be worth considering. However, it's essential to approach this decision thoughtfully.

When discussing this with your parents, consider the following:
- Be Honest: Share your feelings and experiences with them. Explain how social anxiety affects your daily life and your desire to seek help.

- Educate Them: Sometimes, parents may not understand mental health issues. Providing them with resources or articles about social anxiety can help them grasp the seriousness of your situation.

- Propose a Plan: If you decide to take a break, outline a plan for how you will use that time. This could include therapy, self-help strategies, and gradually re-engaging with social situations.

It's natural to fear their reaction, but remember that your mental health is a priority. If they respond negatively, seek support from friends, teachers, or a counselor who can advocate for you.

3. Recommended Hospitals or Doctors in Hsinchu
In Hsinchu, there are several mental health resources you can explore:
- National Taiwan University Hospital Hsinchu Branch: They have a psychiatry department that can provide assessments and treatment for social anxiety.

- Hsinchu City Mental Health Center: This center offers various mental health services, including counseling and therapy.

- Private Psychiatrists: Look for licensed psychiatrists or psychologists in your area who specialize in anxiety disorders. Websites like Psychology Today can help you find professionals based on your location and needs.

Conclusion
Overcoming social anxiety is a process that takes time, patience, and often professional support. While self-help strategies can be beneficial, don't hesitate to reach out for professional help if you feel overwhelmed. Remember, you are not alone in this struggle, and many people have successfully navigated similar challenges. Prioritize your mental health, and take the necessary steps to seek the support you deserve. Your future is bright, and with the right help, you can find a way to engage with the world more comfortably.

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