Psychosomatic issues
Hello Doctor,
I suffered a burn injury and underwent a skin graft surgery at a private hospital when I was seventeen.
Throughout the entire process, the attending physician did not provide any diagnostic analysis or explanation.
After the skin graft surgery failed, the attitude of the medical staff became very unfriendly.
Under immense physical and mental pressure, I did not receive any apologies, which made me feel very scared and wronged.
I have vivid memories of my body being pricked with needles and cut with knives during the post-operative period, and thinking about it causes me immense pain.
My parents and grandmother shift blame onto each other and do not believe that my burn injury is related to them.
Additionally, the long-standing interpersonal issues within my family have left me unsure of how to interact with others.
I fear being hurt; in my family, there is a preference for sons, and girls are expected to leave home once they turn twenty.
The rooms in the house are designated for my brothers, and I often find myself wondering where I should live.
My father was not very pleased about my birth as a daughter.
I have also encountered individuals who have preconceived notions that I am a problematic child, and their attitudes are filled with discrimination and bullying.
They bully me without regard for my well-being, constantly comparing me to other children, which has led to conflicts among peers and affected my friendships.
They deliberately spread rumors about me to isolate me from others, showing no consideration for my need for a peaceful life, thus invading my privacy.
Some unfamiliar parents showcase their children's strengths in front of everyone, intentionally making me look bad to highlight their child's excellence.
I would like to seek advice on how to address and resolve these issues one by one.
How can I achieve psychological balance? How can I refuse and retaliate against the bullying from unfriendly individuals I do not know? Thank you for your response.
Thank you!
pony, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2009/12/30
Dr. Wang Chongren reply Psychiatry
Dear Dr.
Wang Chong-Ren, Department of Psychiatry, Tainan Hospital, Ministry of Health and Welfare:
I sense from your letter that you seem to be experiencing a lot of negative interactions with those around you, leading to feelings of distrust and hostility in your relationships.
It appears that you are struggling to move beyond your current situation.
If you are looking for ways to reject and counteract the bullying from unfamiliar and unfriendly individuals, I recommend seeking in-depth psychological therapy from a mental health professional or psychiatrist.
Engaging in psychological treatment can help you explore your mental state and regain your confidence.
Wishing you good health and peace of mind.
Reply Date: 2009/12/30
More Info
Overcoming psychological trauma, especially stemming from medical experiences and social interactions, is a multifaceted process that requires both self-awareness and professional support. Your experiences, particularly the traumatic memories associated with your burn injury and subsequent treatment, have understandably left a significant impact on your mental health and social interactions. Here’s a comprehensive approach to addressing your concerns and facilitating healing.
Understanding Trauma
Trauma can manifest in various ways, including anxiety, depression, and difficulties in interpersonal relationships. The feelings of fear, helplessness, and isolation you describe are common among individuals who have experienced significant trauma. The lack of support from medical professionals during your treatment, coupled with familial dynamics that seem to dismiss your pain, can exacerbate feelings of worthlessness and anxiety.
Seeking Professional Help
1. Therapy: Engaging with a mental health professional, such as a psychologist or therapist, can be incredibly beneficial. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for trauma-related issues. It helps individuals reframe negative thought patterns and develop coping strategies. Exposure therapy may also be useful, as it gradually helps individuals confront and process traumatic memories in a safe environment.
2. Support Groups: Joining a support group for individuals who have experienced similar traumas can provide a sense of community and understanding. Sharing your experiences with others who have faced similar challenges can help alleviate feelings of isolation.
3. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practices such as mindfulness meditation, yoga, or deep-breathing exercises can help ground you in the present moment and reduce anxiety. These techniques can be particularly useful when you find yourself overwhelmed by memories of your trauma.
Building Healthy Relationships
1. Setting Boundaries: Learning to set boundaries with individuals who are unkind or discriminatory is crucial. You have the right to protect your mental health by distancing yourself from toxic relationships. Practice assertiveness in expressing your needs and feelings. For example, if someone makes a disparaging comment, you can calmly state that their words are hurtful and that you prefer to engage in more positive conversations.
2. Developing Social Skills: If social interactions are challenging, consider seeking resources or workshops that focus on communication skills. Role-playing scenarios with a therapist can help you practice responses to difficult situations, making you feel more prepared and confident in real-life interactions.
3. Finding Supportive Communities: Surround yourself with individuals who uplift and support you. This could be friends, mentors, or community groups that share your interests. Positive social interactions can significantly improve your self-esteem and sense of belonging.
Addressing Family Dynamics
1. Open Communication: If possible, try to communicate your feelings to your family. Express how their actions and words affect you. This may not always lead to immediate change, but it can open the door to understanding and healing.
2. Seeking Family Therapy: If family dynamics are particularly strained, family therapy can provide a structured environment for discussing issues and improving relationships. A therapist can facilitate conversations that may be difficult to have on your own.
Self-Care and Personal Growth
1. Journaling: Writing about your feelings and experiences can be a powerful tool for processing trauma. It allows you to articulate your thoughts and emotions, providing clarity and insight into your healing journey.
2. Engaging in Hobbies: Pursuing activities that bring you joy can help shift your focus away from negative experiences. Whether it’s art, music, sports, or volunteering, engaging in fulfilling activities can enhance your mood and self-worth.
3. Physical Health: Don’t underestimate the connection between physical and mental health. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can significantly impact your mood and overall well-being.
Conclusion
Healing from psychological trauma is a journey that takes time and effort. It’s important to be patient with yourself and recognize that progress may come in small steps. By seeking professional help, building supportive relationships, and engaging in self-care practices, you can work towards overcoming the challenges posed by your past experiences. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and there are resources and people available to support you along the way.
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