I don't like going out at night?
During the New Year’s Eve, I felt overwhelmed by the number of guests, so I went upstairs to rest.
Since then, I have preferred to stay upstairs in the afternoons after hiring staff for the store, and I generally dislike going out in the evenings.
Can you provide some suggestions?
r, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2013/10/04
Dr. Ding Shuyan reply Psychiatry
Hello, human behavior, whether to act or not, usually has its reasons.
The answers vary from person to person, and each individual knows themselves best.
I don't particularly see anything wrong with not wanting to go out at night.
Your description provides too little information, making it difficult for me to comment further.
Perhaps next time you could provide more details in your question.
Wishing you all the best.
Sincerely, Dr.
Ding Shuo-Yan.
Reply Date: 2013/10/04
More Info
Overcoming evening anxiety, especially in social situations, can be a challenging experience for many individuals. It’s common to feel overwhelmed by social interactions, particularly after a long day or during busy times like the holidays. Here are some strategies that may help you gradually re-engage with social activities in the evenings.
Understanding Your Anxiety
First, it’s essential to understand the root of your anxiety. Social anxiety often stems from a fear of judgment or negative evaluation by others. This fear can lead to avoidance behaviors, such as staying indoors or avoiding social gatherings altogether. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward overcoming them.
Gradual Exposure
One effective method for overcoming social anxiety is gradual exposure. Start by setting small, manageable goals for yourself. For instance, if you typically avoid going out in the evenings, try to set a goal to step outside for a brief walk or to sit on your porch for a few minutes. Gradually increase the time you spend outside and the complexity of your social interactions. This could mean inviting a friend over for a short visit or attending a small gathering.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a well-established treatment for social anxiety. It focuses on identifying and challenging irrational thoughts that contribute to anxiety. For example, if you think, “Everyone will judge me if I go out,” try to reframe that thought to something more realistic, like, “Most people are focused on their own experiences and won’t pay much attention to me.” Working with a therapist can help you develop these skills more effectively.
Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques
Incorporating mindfulness and relaxation techniques into your routine can also help manage anxiety. Practices such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can reduce overall stress levels and help you feel more grounded. When you feel anxious about socializing, take a moment to practice deep breathing: inhale deeply for a count of four, hold for four, and exhale for four. This can help calm your nervous system and reduce feelings of anxiety.
Social Skills Training
If you feel that your anxiety is partly due to a lack of social skills, consider engaging in social skills training. This can involve role-playing scenarios with a therapist or trusted friend, practicing conversation starters, or learning how to read social cues. The more comfortable you become with these skills, the more confident you will feel in social situations.
Setting Realistic Expectations
It’s important to set realistic expectations for yourself. Socializing doesn’t have to be perfect, and it’s okay to feel a little anxious. Focus on enjoying the moment rather than worrying about how you are perceived. Remember that everyone has their own insecurities, and most people are more understanding than we often assume.
Seeking Professional Help
If your anxiety continues to interfere with your daily life, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. They can provide personalized strategies and support tailored to your specific needs. Therapy can be a safe space to explore your feelings and develop coping mechanisms.
Conclusion
Overcoming evening anxiety and re-engaging in social activities is a gradual process that requires patience and practice. By understanding your anxiety, gradually exposing yourself to social situations, utilizing CBT techniques, practicing mindfulness, and seeking professional help if needed, you can build your confidence and enjoy socializing again. Remember, it’s okay to take small steps and celebrate your progress along the way.
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