Physiological needs
I haven't had a girlfriend by the age of 40.
Due to physiological needs, I often seek companionship online.
However, I worry about sexually transmitted infections (STIs), which leads me to back out at the last minute.
As a result, many people know about my situation.
Should I have a sexual experience with a woman, or what should I do?
Fu, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2022/10/16
Dr. Lin Mianzhang reply Psychiatry
Hello: It is recommended that you seek a partner through social channels and engage in sexual relations with mutual consent.
If proper protective measures are taken, it should help prevent the transmission of sexually transmitted infections.
Wishing you safety and good health!
Reply Date: 2022/10/16
More Info
Navigating sexual needs and relationships can be a complex journey, especially for individuals who have not yet had intimate experiences by the age of 40. It’s important to approach this topic with sensitivity and an understanding of both physical and emotional aspects of sexual relationships.
First and foremost, it’s completely normal to have sexual desires, and many people experience these feelings at various stages of their lives. The fact that you are aware of your needs and are seeking guidance is a positive step. However, it’s crucial to consider the implications of acting on these desires, especially when it comes to engaging in sexual activities with others.
If you are contemplating whether to pursue a sexual experience, it’s essential to reflect on your motivations. Are you seeking a genuine connection with someone, or are you primarily focused on fulfilling a physical need? Engaging in sexual activities without emotional connection can lead to feelings of emptiness or regret, especially if the experience does not meet your expectations. It’s also important to consider the potential risks involved, such as sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and the emotional consequences of casual encounters.
Given your concerns about STIs, it’s wise to prioritize safety in any sexual encounter. If you decide to engage in sexual activity, using protection, such as condoms, is crucial to reduce the risk of STIs. Additionally, having open and honest conversations with potential partners about sexual health and boundaries is vital for ensuring a safe experience.
If you feel uncertain about how to approach sexual relationships, consider seeking professional guidance. A therapist or counselor specializing in sexual health can provide valuable insights and help you navigate your feelings and desires. They can also assist you in building confidence and improving your self-image, which can be beneficial in forming connections with others.
Moreover, it’s important to recognize that relationships are not solely about sexual experiences. Building emotional intimacy and understanding with a partner can lead to a more fulfilling connection. Engaging in activities that foster emotional bonds, such as shared interests or hobbies, can help you develop meaningful relationships that may naturally progress to physical intimacy when both partners feel comfortable.
If you find yourself frequently turning to online interactions for sexual fulfillment, it may be helpful to explore other avenues for connection. Consider joining social groups, clubs, or activities that align with your interests. This can provide opportunities to meet new people in a more relaxed setting, allowing for organic connections to develop.
Lastly, it’s essential to be patient with yourself. Everyone’s journey in relationships and sexuality is unique, and there is no set timeline for when one should have sexual experiences. Focus on personal growth, building self-esteem, and developing social skills that will serve you well in future relationships.
In summary, while it’s natural to have sexual needs, approaching them thoughtfully and safely is crucial. Reflect on your motivations, prioritize safety, seek professional guidance if needed, and focus on building emotional connections. Remember, meaningful relationships often take time to develop, and being patient with yourself can lead to more fulfilling experiences in the long run.
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