Interpersonal relationships
Recently, I've been feeling down because my interactions with friends haven't been going well.
This has made it difficult for me to engage and communicate with others.
When I see my classmates, I feel anxious and afraid, to the point where I struggle to find topics to talk about.
For the past two days in class, since I live in a dorm with three other people, it seems like they are ignoring my presence.
They often sit together or choose to sit with others, which makes me feel extremely unhappy.
I sometimes try to hypnotize myself into thinking positively, but I ultimately fail and keep spiraling into negative thoughts.
I haven't said much all day, and I can't focus in class, especially with finals coming up next week.
I can't control my emotions, and even though I study hard, my test results are disappointing, which keeps bringing me down.
I wonder if there really is a heaven after death; I want to see what it looks like! I feel guilty towards those who have helped me in the past.
Right now, I don't want to be at school or home; I truly don't know what to do.
I just want to find relief...
I have no motivation to live, and I doubt anyone would be sad if I were gone.
Xiao Hui, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2006/06/15
Dr. Su Zongwei reply Psychiatry
I believe you must be feeling very unwell given your situation.
It's not something that can be resolved by simply asking questions online.
Please seek help from a psychiatrist to discuss your circumstances; I believe things will gradually improve.
If you are experiencing strong suicidal impulses, please urgently seek assistance from a hospital with psychiatric emergency services.
Reply Date: 2006/06/15
More Info
It sounds like you are going through a very challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the pain and frustration you are feeling. Social anxiety can be incredibly overwhelming, especially when it feels like your relationships are strained or when you feel isolated from your peers. It’s important to remember that you are not alone in these feelings, and many people experience similar struggles.
First, let’s address the feelings of isolation and anxiety you are experiencing in your living situation and among your classmates. It can be incredibly disheartening to feel ignored or excluded, especially in a shared living environment. This can lead to a cycle of negative thoughts, where you might start to believe that you are unworthy of connection or that others do not care about you. However, it’s crucial to recognize that these thoughts, while they may feel very real, do not necessarily reflect the truth of your situation. People often get caught up in their own lives and may not be aware of how their actions affect others.
One effective way to combat social anxiety is to gradually expose yourself to social situations, even when they feel uncomfortable. This doesn’t mean forcing yourself into large gatherings or high-pressure situations right away. Start small. Perhaps you could initiate a brief conversation with one of your classmates or simply say hello. The goal is to create small, manageable interactions that can help build your confidence over time.
Additionally, practicing mindfulness and grounding techniques can help you manage anxiety in the moment. When you feel overwhelmed, try focusing on your breath or engaging in a simple physical activity, like stretching or going for a short walk. This can help redirect your thoughts and reduce feelings of panic or despair.
It’s also important to reach out for support. You mentioned feeling like you don’t want to be at school or home, which can be a sign of deeper emotional distress. Talking to a trusted friend, family member, or a mental health professional can provide you with the support you need. They can help you process your feelings and develop coping strategies tailored to your situation. If you feel comfortable, consider seeking counseling services available at your school. Many universities offer free or low-cost mental health resources that can be incredibly beneficial.
Regarding your academic pressures, it’s understandable to feel overwhelmed, especially with exams approaching. Try to break your study sessions into smaller, more manageable tasks. Set realistic goals for what you want to accomplish each day, and give yourself permission to take breaks. Remember, your worth is not defined by your grades or how well you perform in school.
Lastly, I want to address the darker thoughts you mentioned about life and death. It’s crucial to take these feelings seriously. If you are having thoughts of wanting to escape or feeling that no one would care if you were gone, please reach out for help immediately. There are hotlines and resources available where you can talk to someone who understands what you’re going through. You deserve support and help to navigate these feelings.
In conclusion, overcoming social anxiety and the feelings of isolation you are experiencing is a journey that takes time and effort. Be gentle with yourself as you navigate these challenges. Remember, it’s okay to seek help, and taking small steps can lead to significant changes in your emotional well-being. You are worthy of connection, support, and a fulfilling life.
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