Addressing Mental Health Concerns: Supporting Your Daughter's Classmate - Psychiatry

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Regarding the issue of a classmate of my daughter who is expressing a desire not to live?


Hello, I have shared your advice with my daughter, but she believes that the pressure is coming too much from the other child's mother.
She hopes that I can talk to the other child's mother, but I don't think I should intervene.
I believe the teacher will handle it, right? The student who complained is very afraid that their mother will find out, as it would be terrible for them...
Their mother checks the report card, and...
she might hit them.
Should I meet with the mother or pretend to know her? Should I also inform the school teacher or call 113 for assistance, Mrs.
Jiang?

Jiang Tai Tai, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2010/08/02

Dr. Ding Shuyan reply Psychiatry


Yes! If you do not know the other child's parents, communicating with the school teacher is also a good approach.
I believe the teacher will handle it appropriately.
Sincerely, Dr.
Ding Shuo-Yan.

Reply Date: 2010/08/02

More Info


Addressing mental health concerns, especially in children and adolescents, is a sensitive and complex issue that requires careful consideration and action. It’s commendable that you are seeking ways to support your daughter’s classmate, who seems to be under significant pressure from their parent. Here are some steps you can take to help navigate this situation effectively.


Understanding the Situation
From what you’ve described, the classmate is experiencing anxiety and fear related to their mother’s expectations and potential reactions to their academic performance. This kind of pressure can lead to severe mental health issues, including anxiety disorders and depression. It’s crucial to recognize that the child may feel trapped and helpless, fearing that any disclosure of their struggles could lead to punitive consequences from their parent.


Open Communication
While it’s understandable that you may want to approach the classmate’s mother to discuss the situation, it’s essential to consider the potential ramifications. The child’s fear of their mother’s reaction is a significant factor. Instead of directly confronting the mother, it may be more beneficial to encourage open communication with the child. Let them know that they can talk to you or your daughter about their feelings without judgment. Sometimes, just having someone to listen can alleviate some of the burdens they carry.


Involving School Resources
You mentioned the possibility of informing a teacher or school counselor. This is a prudent step. School staff are trained to handle such situations and can provide the necessary support to the child. They can also facilitate a safe environment where the child can express their concerns without fear of retribution. It’s important to approach this delicately; you might suggest to your daughter that she encourage her classmate to speak to a trusted teacher or counselor about their feelings. This way, the child can receive professional guidance and support.


Professional Help
If the situation seems dire, or if the child expresses thoughts of self-harm or severe distress, it may be necessary to involve mental health professionals. In such cases, contacting local mental health services or a crisis hotline (like 113 in some regions) can provide immediate assistance. These services can offer guidance on how to approach the situation and ensure that the child receives the help they need.


Building a Supportive Environment
Encourage your daughter to be a supportive friend. Sometimes, just knowing that someone cares can make a significant difference. She can invite her classmate to engage in activities that promote relaxation and fun, which can help alleviate some of the stress they are experiencing. Simple gestures, like spending time together or engaging in hobbies, can provide a much-needed distraction and a sense of normalcy.


Conclusion
In summary, while it’s tempting to intervene directly with the classmate’s mother, it may be more effective to support the child through open communication and by involving school resources. Encourage your daughter to be a compassionate friend and to help her classmate seek professional support if necessary. Mental health is a critical issue, and addressing it with care and sensitivity can make a significant difference in a young person’s life. Remember, the goal is to create a safe space for the child to express their feelings and seek help without fear of punishment or judgment.

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