I'm not sure what you're referring to. Could you please provide more context or details?
Hello Dr.
Yeh: I apologize for coming to you again; I hope I'm not being bothersome! Although I've been trying hard in my interpersonal relationships, others still seem to not know what to say to me, and I find myself feeling anxious.
As for my roommate, he has been quite cold towards me; one of them usually doesn't interact with me at all and doesn't speak to me.
Today, when I asked him why he treats me this way, he said he doesn't like talking to others.
However, he seems to converse easily with everyone else.
Another roommate dislikes me because I snore while sleeping, which disturbs him.
For instance, when I tried to be friendly and engage him in conversation, his response was very dismissive.
When I offered to lend him some newspapers, he impatiently replied, "I know!" I find this really exhausting.
Why should my mood fluctuate based on my relationships with others? Perhaps I'm destined to be lonely.
I really want to learn from Dr.
Black Jack! However, if I were to completely emulate him, it could negatively impact my health, according to medical understanding, such as acting too cool or not smiling, etc.
I want to be myself, but being myself means having very few friends around me! This isn't just emotional venting; I understand that I should seek help from a psychologist to avoid burdening you, Dr.
Yeh.
It's just that I don't have many people to talk to.
By the way, I still remember your last response, and it has become my motto.
Thank you very much, Dr.
Yeh.
Shehui Bianren, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/05/07
Dr. Ye Baozhuan reply Psychiatry
Social Marginalization: Perhaps you have already taken an important first step in your interpersonal relationships, which is to please others and compromise your own needs.
Continuing this way for a while may yield significant rewards.
Currently, you might feel that others are indifferent, but this could simply mean that your pleasing skills are not yet "refined" (ideally, you should serve like Leonardo DiCaprio serving the queen).
Your issue lies in self-contradiction; you clearly want to please others but also do not want to compromise yourself.
You wish to be humble, yet cannot shake off the inner pride, or you desire to be proud but cannot rid yourself of the inner insecurity.
If you want to learn from the character Black Jack, you need to have "confidence"!
Reply Date: 2004/05/07
More Info
Navigating social anxiety can be a daunting challenge, especially when it feels like you're constantly striving for connection but facing barriers that seem insurmountable. It's important to recognize that you're not alone in this struggle; many people experience similar feelings of isolation and anxiety in social situations. Your desire to connect with others while grappling with the fear of rejection or misunderstanding is a common human experience.
First, let's address the feelings of frustration and loneliness that arise from your interactions with peers. It's disheartening when you make an effort to engage with others, only to be met with indifference or negativity. The situation with your roommate, who seems to prefer solitude yet interacts comfortably with others, can be particularly perplexing. This inconsistency in social behavior can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. However, it's crucial to remember that everyone has their own social preferences and comfort levels. Just because someone else can engage easily doesn't diminish your worth or ability to connect.
One effective approach to managing social anxiety is to gradually expose yourself to social situations in a controlled manner. Start small by initiating brief conversations with acquaintances or classmates. This could be as simple as commenting on the weather or asking about a shared class. The goal is to practice social interactions without the pressure of forming deep connections right away. Over time, these small interactions can build your confidence and help you feel more comfortable in social settings.
Additionally, consider developing coping strategies to manage the anxiety that arises in social situations. Techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, or grounding exercises can help you stay present and reduce feelings of panic. When you feel anxious, take a moment to focus on your breath or engage in a quick mindfulness exercise to center yourself. This can help you approach social interactions with a calmer mindset.
It's also beneficial to challenge negative thoughts that contribute to your anxiety. When you find yourself thinking, "I'm destined to be alone," or "No one will want to talk to me," try to reframe those thoughts. Instead, remind yourself that social skills can be developed over time and that everyone has unique qualities that make them interesting. Practicing self-compassion is key; treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend in a similar situation.
If you find that your social anxiety is significantly impacting your daily life or mental health, seeking professional help can be a valuable step. A therapist or counselor can provide you with tailored strategies to cope with anxiety and improve your social skills. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for social anxiety, as it focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns and behaviors.
Lastly, it's important to cultivate a support system, even if it feels challenging. This could involve reaching out to friends, family, or support groups where you can share your experiences and feelings. Building connections with others who understand your struggles can provide a sense of belonging and reduce feelings of isolation.
In conclusion, navigating social anxiety is a journey that requires patience and self-compassion. While it may feel overwhelming at times, remember that progress is possible. By taking small steps, practicing coping strategies, and seeking support when needed, you can work towards building meaningful connections in your life. Embrace the process, and be gentle with yourself as you navigate this path.
Similar Q&A
Understanding Social Withdrawal: Overcoming Anxiety and Building Connections
I have researched online and found that my situation resembles social withdrawal disorder. I am afraid to initiate conversations and interactions with others. I fear rejection and worry about being criticized behind my back. I believe that if I take the initiative to engage with ...
Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry
Hello Qianqian: Your situation may indeed be related to social anxiety. It's important to be patient, as this condition has the potential to improve. You have your own goals and dreams, and you can truly appreciate and understand the hard work your mother has put in. However...[Read More] Understanding Social Withdrawal: Overcoming Anxiety and Building Connections
Struggling with Loneliness: A Journey Through Social Anxiety
Hello, Doctor: I have been a shy and introverted person since childhood. I have always envied my outgoing classmates who are surrounded by many friends. I hope that one day I can also become outgoing and confident. Throughout my education, from elementary school to university, I ...
Dr. Su Zongwei reply Psychiatry
I've seen it. If it doesn't affect others, just be yourself with peace of mind. If you're in too much pain, consider seeking help from a psychiatric outpatient clinic.[Read More] Struggling with Loneliness: A Journey Through Social Anxiety
Overcoming Social Anxiety: Strategies for Rebuilding Connections and Confidence
I used to be a very outgoing person, but during my educational journey, certain experiences with classmates caused me to become increasingly withdrawn. Now, I have become accustomed to this personality and am very sensitive to the feelings of others. I often sense when people are...
Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry
Hello Nana: Life is not perfect, and everyone has to carry some imperfections as they continue to live. Let the past be the past; every moment can be a fresh start. Engage in positive actions that promote your growth and improvement. Don't give up; with gradual accumulation,...[Read More] Overcoming Social Anxiety: Strategies for Rebuilding Connections and Confidence
Overcoming Social Anxiety: Navigating Relationships and Self-Doubt
Recently, I've been troubled by my relationships with others—whether they are close or distant. I understand that I should have different emotional connections with various friends, family members, or colleagues. However, my concern lies in what I should genuinely care about...
Dr. Chen Yuying reply Psychiatry
Hello SINES: A person's habits can be influenced by past experiences and family interaction patterns. In your interpersonal interactions, it seems that you have a strong fear of making mistakes and worry about being disliked by others. Did you experience negative consequence...[Read More] Overcoming Social Anxiety: Navigating Relationships and Self-Doubt
Related FAQ
(Psychiatry)
Social Interaction(Psychiatry)
Anxiety(Psychiatry)
Phobia(Psychiatry)
Relationships(Psychiatry)
Talking To Oneself(Psychiatry)
Worry(Psychiatry)
Autism(Psychiatry)
Cbt(Psychiatry)
Emotions(Psychiatry)